Trying to sleep while drunk
let me take care of you
Tbh I’m afraid to go to Portland. I’ve heard bad things about it and everyone who lives there, including its local squirrels and mushrooms, no offense.
What if I get attacked by a gang of kombucha homebrewers? What if a young tattooed couple hits me with their $1400 baby stroller? What if someone hands me a hempen flyer for a Christian hot yoga meetup? It’s too dangerous.
DO YOU EVER WONDER WHY YOU HAVE SUCH A STRONG URGE TO SQUEEZE THINGS BECAUSE THEY’RE CUTE
there was an article about it and it said there is nothing to satisfy how you feel about the thing being so cute so the natural human urge is to kill it so it will stop being cute
Trigger warning: Breakfast
reasons why we don’t make fun of seemingly odd triggers
Cool ghost photography by surrealist photographer Cristopher McKenney.
"I don’t wear makeup so I don’t have to waste like an hour in front of the mirror every morning hahahaha"
"open books not legs"
"why have tequila shots when you can have tea?"
"As always, late with Starbucks"
"modest is hottest"
"I’m not like those girls”